Gutting The Fawn

HATE BONDAGE

And I thought,
I hate my life,
But I don’t want to die,
I still have some hope,
What little hope there is left,
When we’re told that these are the best years of our life,

Why do we have our hands up?
This is a robbery,
The education system stole our childhood,
Well what did you expect?
When they tell us of all the ways that we’re going to die,
But luckily she never read the entries I submitted about suicide,
And in that way I guess I was saved,

But since then I have found friends,
Friends that talk about all the wonderful things they would do to me,
If I had a cunt,
And secretly I want those wonderful things,
But not so much that I would change just for him,

She punched a tree,
Because she thought he was dead,
And when she found out he wasn’t,
She said her hand was broken,
But I could see the knuckles and there were just a few scratches,
And it’s been a week,
Why isn’t there a cast?
Are you trying to be tough or are you just stupid?
But I guess that wasn’t the worst,

What happens when we need lithium to have fun?
We have become Zoloft zombies,
Because we’re told the world is fucked,
Who turned us into nihilists?

Why do we hate everything?
Especially ourselves,
But not as much as the others,
Our hatred towards them is what makes us closer,
It is what we share,

I’d like to say that,
“Our little group has always been,
And always will until the end,”
But then I remember I hate Nirvana,
Just as much as we hate each other,

We’ve realized we’re really no one,
We are bound by our hate,
Our fake IDs,
Lost virginity,
And only one abortion so far,
To many fucks to count,
Charades,
Switchblades,
Throwing Knives,
Syringes,
Scalpels,
And pretty designs,
Lighters,
Marlboro,
Mary Jane,
Ecstasy,
JD’s,
Bars that don’t even ID anymore,
Hole in the wall,
Three movies a night,
Dead friends,
Who haven’t disposed of their bodies yet,
Loud music that makes you want to punch babies,
With lyrics about mothers who drown their kids,
Because they love them,
And don’t want them to have to face the world,
And I guess that’s a little like us,
Except we are an act of love,
Formed out of hate,

We wear hate bondage,
But it makes us feel safe,